Thursday, April 19, 2007

Kamikaze Animals

Our neighbors (who live behind our backyard) have been sacrificing their beloved animals in order to torture (or feed?) our hounds. It's still unclear as the purpose of this activity, but the result is very clear: when we get home, it looks like FAO Schwarts exploded in our backyard. These poor creatures lie on the ground, while our dogs walk on them, chew on them and I'm sure pee on them (hopefully in that order!). Wade tried to return these poor creatures to their rightful owners, only to be confronted by a woman who didn't understand his intentions (she doesn't speak English) and kept shaking her head "no" to him. Perhaps she felt that he was offering some kind of love token to her in the form of dirty, stinky stuffed animals. So Wade had no choice but take back the animals and subsequently threw them away.

And I think, "What a sad life these poor Kamikaze Animals have. First they sit in a store just waiting for some snot-nosed to take them home. Then, just when they think they have it made in the shade, the kid sends it FLYING over our fence and into our backyard only to be chewed on and eventually thrown in the garbage.

Now our garbage cans are filled with these homeless fliers, but I figure, eventually the kids will run out of things to throw over the fence, the parents will come to our house to try to claim their lost goods, or the garbage man will have some nice gifts for his garbage man friends.

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